Mail-Order Husbands: Who Are They, How to Find Them, and How Much Do They Cost?

How? Is it legal? How much does it cost? From which countries do the mail-order husbands come? Read this guide and find the answers!

Things to know before mail-ordering a husband

• The best way you can go to meet a mail-order husband is online dating. It’s fast, convenient, and typically costs around $100-$200 per month, which is much cheaper than offline dating.
• The best website for meeting mail-order men right now is Wingtalks. With its huge welcome bonus, a wide set of tools, and more than 1.1 million monthly visits, this platform is the #1 option in the industry right now, so you just can’t miss it.
• The top countries for meeting a mail-order groom are Colombia, Mexico, Canada, South Africa, and the UK. However, there are lots of potential top countries with lots of mail-order grooms—the Philippines, Dominican Republic, Brazil, Japan, etc. 
• There’s no such thing as the median cost of a mail-ordered husband. However, in most cases, one should expect to spend around $4,000-$5,000 to meet and marry a foreign man.

Who is a mail-order husband? 

A mail-order husband is a foreign man who gets married to an American woman. Well, not every man, of course. Meghan Markle is American, and Prince Harry is a foreigner, but this doesn’t make him a “mail-order groom.” Typically, the words “mail-order” are used to indicate that the couple met on an international dating site or with the help of an “international marriage agency.” So if a woman from the US meets a foreign guy on a mail bride/dating site and gets married to him, we can call him a mail-order husband. 

Unfortunately, only around 20% of foreigners on mail-bride sites are male, so it’s very hard to gather statistics. What we know for sure is that most of these men are in their 30s, very well-educated, quite successful, and have 0 children. They also speak English very well (upper-intermediate and advanced) and, obviously, they’re interested in a serious relationship.

How does the mail-order husband process work? 

The best and basically the only way to meet a mail-order husband is through online dating websites. Yes, you can go to Mexico, Brazil, or Japan and try to meet men offline there, but let’s be honest: that’s not how you find a husband. A guy to spend a night with, maybe, but not a husband.

If you want a serious relationship with a foreign man, you need to go online. It’s not only extra-convenient; it’s also more affordable and much safer than traveling alone to another country.

How does it work?

• First, you have to find a dating site. Read the reviews, test them, analyze the numbers with web analytic tools, check the reputation, and make sure the profiles are real. Or skip all these unnecessary steps and just choose WingTalks—a legit, trusted, and popular mail groom website. 
• Then, create a profile. The registration process is extremely fast. Take a look at this screenshot: only your gender, name, and birthday are needed. Of course, they also need your email address (it must be real to sign up).

• Then, there will be a quiz. You’ll have to answer several questions and upload a photo. You can skip those questions, but the more information you have in your profile, the better results you’ll get!

• When it’s done, you’ll be able to like some profiles, and after that, you’ll start using the website

• After the registration, you’ll get 20 credits for free. There’s no need to verify your profile or even your email to get them.

• Setting up your profile is very important—we recommend filling in all those fields. Seriously, the more information you have, the better response rate you’ll get and the more messages you’ll receive. With an empty profile, it’s like 2-3 messages per day, and with a complete one, it’s 20 or even 30!

• Click “Search” to start searching for ladies and click that question mark near your profile photo to change the “status” of your profile (it’s free)

• When you find a profile, make sure it’s real—verified profiles have that blue check near the name. By the way, that’s how most male profiles look on this site: lots of photos, a lot of information, and ID verification. On the profile page, you can start talking to a person, send them a like or a wink, or follow them. Why follow them? Because it’s not just a dating site, actually, it’s more like Facebook with its Newsfeed feature, so you can follow interesting people and read their new posts here.

• Here, you can also start chatting—with free credits, there’s no need to buy anything to get access to the live chat tool. The message you can see in this picture is a pre-written one, you can just click “Say Hello” and a message like this will be sent. Not too personalized, yes, but very convenient.

• After that, it’s up to you. Chat with them, meet them, get married, bring your man to the US—everything’s possible, especially if you’re using WingTalks.

The site has “credits,” as you can see. You’ll need to purchase them in order to get access to messaging tools, and your account will be topped up automatically once you run out of credits. Please, be careful and learn how much all those features cost: real gifts, for example, are pretty expensive here, unlike live chat and virtual gifts.

Why men become mail-order husbands 

Unfortunately, we can’t say that it’s a very common thing for foreign men to become mail-order grooms. However, we asked some of them, analyzed the answers, and here’s what we got:

• The most popular reason is basically the same reason why American women search for foreign husbands: because the grass is greener on the other side. Some of them believe that women from the West are more family-centered, some love that they are strong and independent, the others say that American ladies are very interesting to talk to and very beautiful, etc. 
• The second reason is, well, because “having a relationship with a foreigner is considered an interesting and exciting thing not only in the US.” They do it because they feel like it, because they think it’s going to be a great experience, and because it feels like something exciting and fresh for them. 

Are mail-order husband services legal? 

Yes, totally. Well, in the absolute majority of countries, a local woman can get married to a foreign man legally. We are talking about the so-called Western countries, of course, not about some conservative theocratic states. 

However, despite what some politicians say, there’s no unlimited immigration in the United States, so there are certain requirements you have to meet to bring your foreign husband to the US. 

Thus, there’s the income requirement (your income must be at least 125% of the Federal Poverty Guidelines), your previous marriage must be terminated, your partner must have a police certificate and a medical exam certificate, and of course, you must have a lot of evidence of your relationship (tickets, printed chats, photos, etc). 

Your partner will also need to prepare for his visa interview (he’ll have to answer a ton of questions about your relationship). In some cases, if the authorities suspect marriage fraud, they can even conduct a “bed check,” which means they’ll come early in the morning and check if you live and sleep together with your partner. Sounds weird, but that’s not a common practice, so you don’t need to worry about it if your relationship is real and bona fide.

From which countries are grooms most often “mail-ordered”? 

According to the statistics, most K-1 (fiance(e)) visa holders come from the Philippines, Mexico, Colombia, the Dominican Republic, and Brazil. European countries, such as Ukraine and the UK, are also very popular. However, it’s not that simple. 

The point is, when it comes to the K-1 visa, a typical sponsor is a middle-aged man searching for a bride—according to one of the most popular immigration service providers, RapidVisa, more than 80% of the sponsors are male. This, obviously, means that 80% of the K-1 visa holders are foreign brides, so unfortunately, the number of foreign husbands is just too small to analyze. 

What we know for sure is that on Wingtalks, for example, most non-US users are from Canada, South Africa, the UK, and Japan. Why are these men so popular? 

Canadian men are native English speakers, so there are no language barriers with them. They are polite and sweet, very kind and quite calm, and that’s a great combination for a long-term relationship.

South Africa? Traditional, hard-working, direct men with traditional views. They’ll protect you and support you no matter what, and they are also very loyal, despite the stereotypes.

As for the UK, it’s simple: they are exactly like the guys in your neighborhood, but slightly more intelligent, polite, and modest. And their accent, of course…

Japanese men? “Exotic,” very interesting to talk to, intelligent, polite, calm, and very family-centered (although they might be slightly reserved at first).

Latin America is also extremely popular among those searching for a foreign partner. Men here are passionate, very emotional, and romantic. They believe in those traditional gender roles, so they’ll always protect you. Plus, let’s be honest, they are really hot!

How much do mail-order grooms cost?

First of all, you’ll date them online. Most international dating sites have a credit-based system, so let’s talk about how much you’ll pay for them. Let’s take Wingtalks as an example. Let’s say you buy the largest credit pack, spend 300 minutes in live chat, and send 30 first emails to different men here. How much is it?

• The largest credit package here costs $200 (1,000 credits) 
• It’s $0.2 per credit
• 1 minute of live chat costs 2 credits of $0.4
• 300 minutes of live chat cost $120
• Sending 1 first email costs 10 credits
• 30 first emails cost 300 credits or $60
• Total—$180 per month 

You may spend more than that or less than that—it’s up to you. There are some expensive features here (like sending gifts and watching videos), so if you watch too many videos, $180 will probably not be enough. On the other hand, if you focus on live chat, you’ll probably save some money!

Now, offline dating. It’s strongly not recommended to go to another country as a solo female traveler, but you’ll still need to visit your future husband at least once. Let’s say you’ll spend two weeks there. How much does it cost? 

Well, it depends heavily on the region you’re going to visit. Here’s a very approximate price of a two-week trip to different world regions: 

When it comes to the mail-order groom cost, there are too many factors to consider. From the region and the amount of time you spend in a live chat to the season and the number of stars in a hotel rating, the price may vary greatly based on all these factors. 

The good news is that unlike American men marrying a foreign girl, you will probably not have to pay for the dates, buy expensive gifts, and pay the visa fee (because in most “mail-order husband” countries, men consider it their responsibility to pay for such things).

You can’t “order” a husband. But you can find a soulmate—and you can do it today 

These men are traditional, strong, protective, and family-centered. They know how to make a woman happy, they are always supportive and caring, and they are a perfect choice for a serious, long-term relationship. Even the language barrier is not actually a problem with them because the absolute majority of these men speak pretty decent English!

And you don’t need to go to Canada, South Africa, Poland, or the UK to meet them. Sign up here—as you already know, it’s free and extremely fast. Join the dating site, find a real mail-order boyfriend, and start building your new, international relationship today!

Written byJohn Millerstone, Author

We decided to create this project because we’re tired of the situation in the industry. 10 years ago, there were like 40% good sites and 60% bad ones. Today, the ratio is more like 10% to 90%, and that’s not how I want it to be. I mean, it kills me that when an American man types “mail order brides” on Google, there is a 90% possibility that he won’t even find a good dating site, let alone find a bride. I want to change that.

Edited byPhilippe Berry, Contributing Editor

I'm going to tell you everything I know, mes amis. We'll spot online dating charlatans, test the dating sites together, and, of course, with me, you'll learn everything about traveling—I have had 33 trips since 2009, and I think traveling is the best part of online dating. I'll tell you how to save money, how to enjoy a trip, and how to have a good date in a foreign country. I know something about that, too!

Learn more about our Editorial Team